November, 3 years ago…

Is when James and I had our first miscarriage.  I remember it like it was yesterday.  I remember spending a whole week not having a clue what was going on.  We had a scan in which we were told the baby was no longer growing but had to wait another week to confirm.  A whole week of swinging between hope and devastation… a few days after the second scan, we lost the baby and it was over in that moment.
I never thought that our little family would ever experience such heartbreak and I never ever imagined that we would go through it a second time too.  Those two years of trying to have another baby and losing two pregnancies, were so hard…

I always wanted Ollie to be closer in age to any babies we had… but it didn’t happen that way.  As it turns out though, we struck gold with the age gap we eventually came to!  Nate and Ollie are so perfectly spaced, that I can’t imagine them being any closer now.  I think the reason things have gone so smoothly this far is because the age gap works well.

I think about how I felt this time, 3 years ago.  I was heartbroken… I never knew we would go through it again and spend many many many more months trying for a baby.

But look at us now… my family is amazing… and complete… I couldn’t have wished for my boys to be more incredible and every day I look at them and can’t believe my luck.  Imagine if we had stopped trying after the first miscarriage… we wouldn’t have what we have now.

3 thoughts on “November, 3 years ago…

  1. Sarah says:

    Having been through the worst year of my life this year I know exactly how you felt suffering 2 miscarriages. We’re hoping 2013 will be 3rd time lucky for us and we won’t have to suffer anymore heartache . Trying for a 3rd time is scary, but it gives me huge hopes reading how it happened to you and how things turned out in the end, you do have a lovely family.


  2. J says:

    Life is hard, I don’t think anyone would deny that, but life is great too. What happens to us shape us into who we are. You have super boys.You are very lucky.


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